“Whose balls do I have to break to get some cabbage around here?”
Genius Rabbit wasn’t this perturbed usually but his mind was kind of fucked greatly because of the current case he was handling. It was something he had not dealt with since the time Book Worm had lost his memory after the 9/11 attacks. It took him almost an hour to treat him. To make him remind of the many tigers he had killed in his lost state.
This case was different although. Not because the victim and the culprit were the same but because the victim and the culprit were avid television watchers. A person so addicted to the world of television is not fooled by the whims and fancies of the real world. The victim and the culprit was Psychopath George. In an attempt to take revenge from his long-time rival Happy Fred, Psychopath George had accidently fallen prey to his kindness. Why was this bad? This was bad because Happy Fred was one of the top criminals of Mount Paramount Pictures.
“Here you are, sir.” The giraffe whispered in fear. He kept the plate of cabbage and a glass of whiskey on the table. Genius Rabbit did not care to break his balls. He was just too paralyzed at the moment. He needed something to work his brain.
Rip. Spread. Snort. Aah!
He took a sip of the whiskey and took a bite of the cabbage. He felt much better. He recalled how he had gotten to know Psychopath. The many times they hung out at Julia Roberto Carlos’s house. Julia was Genius’s ex-girlfriend. What a team they used to be. Fighting crime, catching bad guys, hitting small ducks on their heads. It was all so much fun.
“Fuck!” Genius shouted in anger. He at once gulped down the whiskey and swallowed the cabbage. He kept the money on the table and rushed out.
The strong wind made his long ears flap frantically. His long coat avoided the cold breeze to get to his private parts. He was a bit drowsy after the drugs and the whiskey but mostly because of the cabbage.
He sat inside his Aston Martin and took off. He had to meet Julia Roberto Carlos. He had to know why Psychopath met Happy Fred in the first place. Psychopath knew of his evil ways. He knew how Happy Fred would call people over, give cookies, milk and made them watch…television.
Genius rang the bell.
Out came the most beautiful girl that Genius had ever laid his eyes upon. Why the fuck did things go so wrong?
“I need to ask you some questions, Julia.”
“Wont you come in?” It was the sweetest voice.
“Ah…no. I’m comfortable here.” Genius paused and continued. “You were with Psychopath the night he went to meet Happy Fred. Did he tell you anything?”
“Well…all he told me was that he had had enough of Happy Fred’s nonsense. He was going to make things straight.” Julia paused and continued, almost in a whisper. “He never came back.” Her eyes hinted the outflow of tears. Something Genius Rabbit was absolutely scared of.
“Don’t worry. I’ll bring him back. If he’s dear to you…he’s dearer to me.” Julia was Psychopath’s current girlfriend.
Intense, eh?
“Just tell me…if at all…you remember. Did he say anything at all? Of where he would be?”
Julia stood silently for a while, remembering. Suddenly she erupted “He said something about a hash bar, down at Lionel Messichusetts.”
“That’s all I need to know.” Genius said with a smirk. He said it because he knew who ran that place. How could he ever forget the night when they all got so fucking stoned that they did not even remember that they were originally animals with irregular names in this weird human-type story which might or might not even make a sensible ending.
Genius as he was, Genius Rabbit told his trusted side-kick Dumb Ass to get him some nice pepperoni pizza from the pizza parlor down south, Some Nice Pepperoni Pizza.
Genius Rabbit wasn’t this perturbed usually but his mind was kind of fucked greatly because of the current case he was handling. It was something he had not dealt with since the time Book Worm had lost his memory after the 9/11 attacks. It took him almost an hour to treat him. To make him remind of the many tigers he had killed in his lost state.
This case was different although. Not because the victim and the culprit were the same but because the victim and the culprit were avid television watchers. A person so addicted to the world of television is not fooled by the whims and fancies of the real world. The victim and the culprit was Psychopath George. In an attempt to take revenge from his long-time rival Happy Fred, Psychopath George had accidently fallen prey to his kindness. Why was this bad? This was bad because Happy Fred was one of the top criminals of Mount Paramount Pictures.
“Here you are, sir.” The giraffe whispered in fear. He kept the plate of cabbage and a glass of whiskey on the table. Genius Rabbit did not care to break his balls. He was just too paralyzed at the moment. He needed something to work his brain.
Rip. Spread. Snort. Aah!
He took a sip of the whiskey and took a bite of the cabbage. He felt much better. He recalled how he had gotten to know Psychopath. The many times they hung out at Julia Roberto Carlos’s house. Julia was Genius’s ex-girlfriend. What a team they used to be. Fighting crime, catching bad guys, hitting small ducks on their heads. It was all so much fun.
“Fuck!” Genius shouted in anger. He at once gulped down the whiskey and swallowed the cabbage. He kept the money on the table and rushed out.
The strong wind made his long ears flap frantically. His long coat avoided the cold breeze to get to his private parts. He was a bit drowsy after the drugs and the whiskey but mostly because of the cabbage.
He sat inside his Aston Martin and took off. He had to meet Julia Roberto Carlos. He had to know why Psychopath met Happy Fred in the first place. Psychopath knew of his evil ways. He knew how Happy Fred would call people over, give cookies, milk and made them watch…television.
Genius rang the bell.
Out came the most beautiful girl that Genius had ever laid his eyes upon. Why the fuck did things go so wrong?
“I need to ask you some questions, Julia.”
“Wont you come in?” It was the sweetest voice.
“Ah…no. I’m comfortable here.” Genius paused and continued. “You were with Psychopath the night he went to meet Happy Fred. Did he tell you anything?”
“Well…all he told me was that he had had enough of Happy Fred’s nonsense. He was going to make things straight.” Julia paused and continued, almost in a whisper. “He never came back.” Her eyes hinted the outflow of tears. Something Genius Rabbit was absolutely scared of.
“Don’t worry. I’ll bring him back. If he’s dear to you…he’s dearer to me.” Julia was Psychopath’s current girlfriend.
Intense, eh?
“Just tell me…if at all…you remember. Did he say anything at all? Of where he would be?”
Julia stood silently for a while, remembering. Suddenly she erupted “He said something about a hash bar, down at Lionel Messichusetts.”
“That’s all I need to know.” Genius said with a smirk. He said it because he knew who ran that place. How could he ever forget the night when they all got so fucking stoned that they did not even remember that they were originally animals with irregular names in this weird human-type story which might or might not even make a sensible ending.
Genius as he was, Genius Rabbit told his trusted side-kick Dumb Ass to get him some nice pepperoni pizza from the pizza parlor down south, Some Nice Pepperoni Pizza.
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