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The Chronicles of Genius Rabbit: Armageddonkey

March 14, 2013

Apparently the world did not end. But it had changed radically. It somehow happened that when the supposed Planet X hit the earth, it dropped some of its beings onto our planet and blew the water and trees out because of the impact. So now, our planet looked somewhat like their's and their's looked like a big rubber ball, which bounced out of the galaxy.

Genius Rabbit stood on top on a giant boulder on top of a giant mountain on top of a giant spaceship which crashed at the time of the massive attack. As he smoked his cigarette, he thought about how different the world had now become.

“Genius!”

There was a shout from a distance.

Genius looked back and it was Julia Roberto Carlos. “What're you doing here?” Genius asked, blowing smoke out.

“I just found something on that beach. It isn't a human being.”

“I ain't a human being. You have be specific.” Genius snapped.

“What I mean is that it's an extra terrestrial.”

There was a brief moment of silence. Genius threw his cigarette and jumped on his Harley. It was amazing how he kept it intact, just like in the movie 2012, where the three principle characters never die, even though, the worst of things happen to them. He knew the movie couldn't exaggerate.

“Hop on!”

Genius and Julia rode to the beach. It had been long since Julia and Genius had met. Specially after Psychopath George's demise through the evil hands of Happy Fred (refer to 'The Chronicles of Genius Rabbit: Psychopath gone sober', but it wouldn't help because it ends on an incomplete note).

“There!” Julia shouted and pointed towards a shadow at the end of the beach. It resembled a four legged creature from planet earth. Genius went closer to inspect the extra terrestrial organism from Planet X.

It was a donkey.

“Armageddonkey.” the creature grunted.

Yes, it was an armageddonkey.

“Armageddonkey? What..it's like a pun or something?” Genius asked, amused. “I mean the Armageddon happened three months ago. You can't have that name from the beginning of your life?”

“I was born to make this event happened. I was constructed for the destruction.”

Genius, still amused and now a little pissed, spoke, “You planet made a donkey for destruction? It's like making an apple the president. You guys are dumb.”

“In your planet, yes they are. On ours, we are the most evil organisms that cause destruction, mayhem and premature deliveries. We're real evil.”

Genius was not convinced so he wanted to know more about the creature. “Do some destruction for me.”

Armageddonkey shot a laser through his eyes and created a huge explosion in the sea. A couple of dolphins jumped out from the sea and flew into the sky.

“Whoa! That's amazing.” exclaimed an awe-struck Julia.

“But why did this destruction take place? You almost erased humanity and the developments that took years to get established.”

Armageddonkey put his arm around Genius's shoulder and took a stroll with him.

“You see. Your planet was never meant to have life. Come on, the rest of the planets don't. At least, not as advanced as you. I mean, I could have been Brad Pittsburgh. But I'm not. So, it was amazing to see life grow and get evolved on this planet for years and years. Now, we saw that evolution couldn't really take other life forms. I mean, there are PLindsays and TSheens, but they don't matter. So, we thought, we could start everything from the beginning.”

“Are you crazy?” Genius shouted. “The people living were still living. They did not die. It's not like our planet was intruding into your space. We were happy. At least I was. Now I don't know a god-forsaken place where I can find hemp.”


Wait. Is this turning out to be an alien-destroying-human-race-and-telling-them-that-they-were-making-a-mess-out-of-everything sort of a story? Let me change that.

Genius and Armageddonkey sat on the beach, looking at the sun, smoking, sipping their whiskey.

“So how're the chicks up at Planet X?”

“They're ok. They look alike, you know. We're all donkeys at the end of the day.”

Genius will now talk to you and give you some good advise. Remember Genius, good advice. Now give me your stash.

“Here. Pothead! Trying to get all awesome with random stories which make no fucking sense and leaving no scope of continuing the story from where you left it. Well..so yeah. Kids. By this story, we understand that we really don't want to waste our life with silly, materialistic things. We should make the most of the things available to us and make life productive. We got one life. And we should try to make the most of...hahahahahaha. I can't go on. Give me that!”





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